Inner Rage
by Commander Crane
Summary: The entire 104th listening to him as he declared he would slaughter every titan, his solemn vow to destroy humanities enemies as long he was alive. What if Eren didn't have Titan powers and survived with skill and teamwork. Warning: For those who haven't read the manga past Episode 25 in the anime there may be some spoilers later in the road. ErenxMikasa. Review if you can :)
1. Wrath

It was dark, so dark, moans of pain entered Eren's ears as he slowly sunk into the foul smelling juices of the titan's gut.  
"I've been eaten alive" though Eren, the thoughts flying tumultuously through his mind.  
Everything hurt, his back, his head and his eyes. He could feel the stumps where his arm and leg used to be throbbing with agony as the bile seared the exposed flesh.  
"I'm going to die, but at least Armin is safe."  
This small mercy eased the panic as he slowly drifted down into the sludge, let his mind ease the passing of his body.  
"Promise me you'll come back alive.  
Eren eyes snapped open just as his neck began to submerge.  
"I promised her, I swore I would come back."  
He flashed back to where Armin was sitting on the stairs, crying, but trying to hard to stay silent.  
"I swear Armin I will kill every last titan for what they did."  
Eren remembered the moment where the Smiling Titan ate his mother, his tears burning his face, Hannes panting, the smell of fear, Mikasa holding him tightly.  
The entire 104th listening to him as he declared he would slaughter every titan, his solemn vow to destroy humanities enemies as long he was alive.  
"I'M STILL ALIVE YOU SON OF A BITCH!" Eren screamed, "I SWORE TO EVERYONE, TO ARMIN, TO MIKASA!"  
Eren still holding his blade, a solider, a consummate survivor, the weapon was his life-line, even in death his hand would never drop his weapon.  
"I SWORE TO END YOU" Eren could feel his eyes even in the darkness widening and the grin which his only sported when thinking of titans.  
"I WILL KILL YOU ALL!"  
The ooze bound his tightly but Eren will to live was second only to his will to kill, he struggled to straighten and with a scream his lunged and lunged until his connected with the wall of the titans stomach.  
The blade bounced back, Eren swung wildly, again and again every time a failure but each time he failed his rage grew until his throat was raw.  
"I WILL NOT BE EATEN, I WILL KILL YOU ALL!"  
Suddenly a shaft of light and screaming assaulted Eren from above. He looked up and saw the titan's throat.  
He must be eating someone. It could be Armin, Mikasa, Jean it could be my friends!  
"ARGH" Launching himself as hard as he could, Eren got his manoeuvre gear free of the slime and using the one cable he could aimed it at the roof of the titan's throat.  
A sickening crunch followed by an abrupt end to the screaming and darkness once again, Eren soul hardened as his pure resolve and will pushed the trigger, followed by the sound of squelching as the grapple stuck in.  
Screaming again Eren reeled himself up at top speed, crashing into the flesh and kicking of the back of the throat. Flying across the soft flesh of what Eren could only assume was the tongue he was flung into the titan's teeth. Seeing light through the cracks drove his mad resolve, screaming and panting Eren jammed his blade into the titan's gum.  
The roar was deafening and as the mouth opened, Eren took his chance, seeing nothing but blinding whiteness he fired his cable and hearing that tell-tale crack, he flew from the titan's mouth.

Staring blearily at the tiled rooftops, Eren slowly came too. His head now at the forefront of his pain management, he saw he had gone headfirst into a chimney. Dazed and concussed he saw the titan he just escaped two streets away fumbling for a way around to eat him.  
Eren knowing he had to stay calm tried to stand himself but just ended up flopping from side to side. He was confused until he looked down and his senses returned in full force. He was trying to push himself up with a stump. His entire left forearm was gone.  
His heartbeat went overdrive and the panic set in. He was going to die, Eren tried to stand again using his fist clutching the blade and promptly rolled down the roof nearly falling to his death. Grabbing the gutter at the last second Eren was for a second time completely fazed by this. He has stood up normally for years, surely his arm wouldn't stop him.  
The memories slowly came back, everything, Thomas being eaten, his mad dash to avenge him and then…  
"Oh god" Eren mumbled, the horror setting in yet again.  
Even hanging, minutes from death Eren couldn't bring himself to look down, he already knew it but didn't want to believe it. He knew his left leg was gone as well.  
"God I'm crippled, I can't fight, I'm nothing!" Eren yelled, his tears mixed with the blood running down his face.  
The sobs choked him and he actually thought about letting go of the rooftop, just to end this nightmare.  
He would recall later in life that it wasn't resolve or will that made him survive, but as he hung there crying like he did 5 years ago the thing that kept him going wasn't love or dedication but pure, unadulterated, unbridled rage.  
A roar brought him back to reality, the beared titan had found its way to his street and was closing in on his rooftop.  
Eren's grin flew onto his face as he let go of the roof top  
"Hey asshole, your kinda stupid for actually coming back to me" he said falling through the sky, "because even if there's only half of me left."  
Activating his cable it struck low down past the titan and he flew down sliding the ground hard. Kicking up the cable returned and he swung about firing it at the titans exposed neck. With a huge burst of gas he rocketed into the titan's neck gouging his blade in deeply and wrenching it across, brutally severing the titan's life.  
"It's still more than enough to kill filth like you!" Eren screaming at the top of his lungs, relishing his first titan kill.

With a sigh the tian crashed to the ground flinging Eren down hard. It was enough to crack a rib or two and he blacked out for a few moments.  
Lying there staring at the sky after coming back he wondered why he hadn't bled out. Thinking like Armin he assumed the titan's stomach was acidic enough to cauterize the open flesh but just tenderise the rest.  
"I feel really heavy on one side, this is totally gonna suck" Eren lamented beginning to feel pretty sorry for himself.  
Suddenly feeling it was hard to breathe Eren rolled quickly to the side and coughed up some blood.  
"Shit, even if the arm and leg don't kill me everything else soon will."  
Pushing up onto his one knee leaning his arm across the ground like a bar he was able to prop himself up some. The smell of burning titan kept his spirits up as he forced himself in the air and balanced on his one good leg. Wobbling, he pushed his blade to the ground and leaned to the right so he wouldn't fall over.  
"I look like some retarded scarecrow for scaring kids" Eren chuckled making his lungs burn like fire.  
"Okay need to get to a rooftop" he surmised, "if I pass out down here I'm screwed but at least up there someone could find me."  
Using his manoeuvre gear his launched onto the nearest rooftop, clipping his foot on the way up. Cursing as he fell over and planted into the tiles, he wondered if it would be even possible to get out of here using just one cable, there was no balance and even less ability to use his gears name sake.  
"Okay just got to focus and re-group" Eren mumbled, not noticed his voice was starting to slur.  
Though his did notice his vision getting dimmer. Blood loss was taking its toll and without treatment Eren would die.  
"First thing's first got to get back over the wall and survive, just have to sur…"  
Eren cut himself short as in his field of vision he saw an abnormal clutching a building and climbing in a weird fashion. His vision which was blurry became stark and focused, tinging with red Eren said one word before he rushed the titan's position.  
"Thomas." 

_Author's Note: Don't get me wrong I adore Shingeki no Kyojin's epic universe and diverse set or characters but I remember when I first watching the anime with my mates and we screamed "Holy shit the main character got taken out." We were blown away by the courage and change of pace this brought to the show. Then super-power titan comes out and we are going "Oh my god this is so epic an abnormal that kills titans what's next?" then it turned out to be Eren and it sort of killed it for me. I still loved it but always wondered if you wanted Eren to survive why not let him use his mad skills and epic rage moments to dictate his survival odds.  
So that's what inspired this to be written. Hope you enjoy it friends._

C.C.


	2. Hope

Mikasa had never felt like this. Shock couldn't cover it her heart literally felt nothing, no warmth, no beat. Armin was weeping and clutching her pants, begging her to forgive him.  
"What for?" Mikasa asked  
Armin was confused even in his state, I just told her Eren is dead and it's my fault.  
"Mi-Mikasa, Eren is dead."  
"No he isn't"  
"Mik…"  
Armin sentence was cut short but Mikasa backhand smashing into his face. Armin felt like his jaw had come off as he flew backwards into the building.  
Armin stared through his tears at Mikasa's face, seeing her hand still raised she stood there like a statue she didn't move and neither did anyone else.  
"He isn't dead," she said in a monotone so devoid of emotion chills were sent through the heart of every recruit present, "Eren can't die."  
Armin looked around and saw everyone dubious looks and his tears returned in full force, Eren so strong and resolute was everyone's rock in their fight for survival, his do or die attitude had even brought Jean around. No one could believe he was dead.  
"T-Thomas got taken out by an abnormal" Armin began to everyone's shock.  
"Eren was so mad, he just rushed in and we all followed, we weren't thinking and then…"  
Armin's words got stuck in his throat, his face still burning. Suddenly he felt a warm hand on his arm, turning he saw Annie, the last person in the universe who he thought would provide comfort. Despite her eyes saying she was disturbed her presence meant he had to continue.  
"The abnormal turned on Eren suddenly and took him down."  
Everyone gasped and Jean whispered "No."  
"We were ready to attack it from all four sides when we were ambushed by two other titans."  
"I managed to dodge but everyone else was eaten, then I wasn't paying attention and a titan grabbed me and ate me…"  
The recruit who had collected Armin from the rooftop remembered him being covered in slime and whispered "Oh god."  
"How did you escape?" Bertolt asked.  
Everyone saw Armin's eyes go wide as he fell to his knees and the sobs racked every inch of his body.  
"Eren was still alive." Armin choked out.  
"Hey Armin" Jean came over and put his hand on his shoulder, "its okay you don't need to saw anymore."  
"Yes he does" Mikasa said coldly.  
"Hey back off Mikasa" Jean yelled angrily, "the kids been through the fucking ringer and you're treating him like a criminal."  
"Where is Eren!?" Mikasa screamed.  
It was an emotional scream, it was something you heard about it books when someone can yell but it's so icy and cold that it haunts people just by hearing it.  
"H-he pulled me out," Armin cried, "threw me onto the nearby roof and then he reached out to me and…"  
Mikasa shoving Jean and Annie aside grabbing Armin collar hauling him to his feet screaming "You're lying!"  
"Eren isn't dead, he can't be dead, he isn't dead."  
Mikasa's armour chipped away and her cheeks had tinged red, her eyes were shiny with tears.  
"Armin why are you lying to me?" Mikasa croaked as she slowly let him back down to his feet.  
Armin slowly took her hands away from and pressed is forehead against hers.  
"I'm so sorry Mikasa" Armin cried, "Please don't hate me."  
Mikasa pulled Armin into a hug and cried into his shoulder, her heart was breaking into a thousand pieces, everything she pushed away was caving in on her. Eren was her everything, her shoulder, her back, her blade, her heart. The world went so grey without Eren in it.  
Pulling back she used Eren's scarf to wipe away the tears and put back the face of composure for the rest.  
While Mikasa and Armin were having their moment Jean had gone and leaned against a chimney, staring off into the distance at the building where their gas refills were.  
"Hey" says Connie, "you thinking about how to get there without becoming titan chow."  
"Yeah" replied Jean, "but everyone one of them involved that Suicidal Bastard giving some rousing speech to encourage us to go kill ourselves."  
Jeans stared at his feet saying this, he felt sad, something he never though he would over the death of one Eren Jaeger.  
"Yeah" said Connie also looking down, "never thought someone like him could just go and die like that."  
"I get that, it's just so hard to believe you know?"  
"Yeah Jean I get you."  
Mikasa had gone to the edge of roof with Armin in tow, neither of them had tears anymore just a look of determination, Jean saw their eyes and couldn't help but smile thinking about calling them mini-Jaegers.  
"Hey Connie get ready we're leaving."  
"On your six Jean."  
"Okay everyone we're moving out" Mikasa yelled at the top of her lungs, "I'm strong, stronger than any of you."  
"I will carve the way through the titan's front ranks, Annie, Reiner, Bertolt take the left flank.  
"Jean, you, Connie and Marco take the right flank.  
"On it!" came the resounding cry.  
"Everyone else follow Armin and I, keep tight and keep watch!"  
"Yes ma'am!"  
"MOVE OUT!"  
Mikasa leapt from the roof, activating her gear and flying forward ahead of everyone else, the wind in her face helped ease the ache in her chest. She would live for him, live up to him, make the man she would have followed into hell proud.

"Mikasa's out of gas" Armin shouted.  
"Dammit" came the reply from Jean.  
"Jean keep the flank alive, I'll go with Armin" said Connie.  
"Be careful."  
Connie leapt across to Armin and the two diverted over the left flank to give Reiner the centre position.  
Mikasa had crashed and twisted her ankle, making her limp which meant when that a titan came around and boxed her in she knew she was helpless to escape. Clutching the remains of her blade she though "Don't worry Eren, you won't be lonely for long."  
Although her sentiments were cut short when a cable tripped the titan and Connie slashed in killed it cleanly as his 8th position ranking was made clear.  
"Armin nice trip" Connie shouted gleefully at Armin.  
"Back at you with those perfect cuts."  
The two fist bumped at their teamwork and then set too swapping out Armin's tanks with Mikasa's.  
"W-What are you doing Armin." Mikasa stammered, "I'm not going to leave you behind.  
"Don't be silly Mikasa." Armin chastised, "Connie's going to help me get there and you're a better fighter which means you need to be more mobile."  
Mikasa sighed in relief, Armin strategist personality must have kicked in on his way over to get her.  
"Okay all set" said Armin.  
"Let's do this!" they all said in unison.

Jean crashed through the windows of the supply building and tumbled into a heap, his eyes betraying the horror he felt at what he had done. Reiner hadn't been able to make the call so Jean had stepped in, taking command over the recruits and forcing them to abandon their teammate being eaten because it would distract the titan's long enough to give them a chance to get by.  
Jean felt the bile in his throat and even dry retched a little thinking about how he could have been such a monster.  
Looking around as the other crashed through various windows he saw only about half had made it.  
"Damn it."  
Jean's blood went from ice cold to boiling point when he saw two officers huddled under a table, crying. Two adults, from the supply team hiding while all the new recruits were out their dying because they ran out of gas.  
"YOU FUCKING C*NTS!" Jean screamed.  
He had one of them down with a punch and dragged the other to her feet within a second, his blade sprung into his hand.  
"YOU FUCKERS!" Jean couldn't stop screaming, "YOU LEFT US OUT THERE TO DIE!"  
"YOU HID IN HERE WHILE WE DIED YOU FUCKING COCKSUCKERS!"  
Jean vaguely knew someone was pulling him back.  
"Jean cool off we have more important things to w…"  
"HIT THE DECK" yelled Reiner.  
Jean and his back warmers slapped to the ground in an instant dodging the debris caused by titan's faced smashing into the building, the two supply officers were torn to shreds.  
Seconds later Mikasa, Armin and Connie crashed through another window, rolling across the ground and coming to a stop just beside where Reiner had hit the ground.  
"So nice of you to join us" said Reiner his voice dripping with sarcasm.  
"Bite me" retorted Mikasa.  
All of recruits turned to face the two titans jamming their heads into the building.  
"Retreat into the building" shouted Jean, "it will buy us some time."  
Everyone ran as fast as they could into the central area of the building, Mikasa looked behind and watched the face drop away from the gap, "they must be looking for another way in" she thought.

 _Author's Note: I often thought throughout the anime/manga Mikasa's character should have a bit more soul. Yeah you can be cold and heartless at times but if you're reason for living dies you're not going to shrug it off. There will be disbelief, anger and anguish then a cool off in which you realise you need to keep a level head. Although when she found him alive in the titan was pretty damn heart-warming. Hope you're still enjoying yourselves. Peace._

 _C.C._


	3. Victory

The last thing Jean was worrying about was the crate of guns digging into his shoulder as he manfully hauled them to the rest of the group.  
"The way they look at me" Jean though, "it's like awe, they think I'm a leader."  
"Fuck, I'm anything but a leader."  
Jean got into the room and saw their faces again, they looked up and some smiled, other nodded, even Mikasa and Armin had the looks of respect, "Shit Reiner must have brought them up to speed."  
"Hey everyone" chimed Jean with fake enthusiasm, "Lookie what we have here, complements of the Military Police."  
Everyone gave a small faint cheer and despite the misery in the air lined up in front of the boxes grabbing guns.  
"Hey Armin" Jean called out  
"Hmm" Armin didn't say much as he was pouring over a diagram with Mikasa and the Wolf Pack.  
"You sure this is going to work, I mean it's crazy."  
"Not like we have any other options here Jean."  
"That's the sad part of this whole messed up situation."  
"Gather around everyone!" Reiner called out, "time to receive your orders."  
The recruits gathered around the Wolf Pack, Mikasa, Armin and Jean.  
"Okay here's how it's going to go down" Armin began, "The underground area has been filled with seven four meter class titans."  
"We are going to lower down on the elevator with everyone facing out to draw the titan's attention, when they are all in range we open fire with buckshot blinding them."  
"Then the seven best swordsmen here will leap from the ceiling killing all seven at once."  
The room could not have been more silent if someone had just threatened to sacrifice as virgin. Everyone's eyes were wide, not because the plan was crazy but because the crazy plan was the only choice.  
"Load up" said Jean, "don't be stupid and just follow the plan."

Jean, Annie, Reiner, Connie, Potato Girl, Mikasa and Bertolt were hiding in the darkness of the rafters as the light of the elevator gently descended into the room. The elevator creaking caught the titan's attention and when they saw the humans they started shuffling over.  
The elite team tensed in preparation ready to move, the titans were nearly in range.  
"FIRE!"  
The room erupted into gunfire, Jean's ears were deafened for a moment but regardless he charged forwards and leapt from the ceiling towards his titan. Executing a perfect slash as he fell Jean's titan was killed, he combat rolled and looked around seeing his, two, three, four, five.. "Shit" he thought.  
Connie and Potato Girl have missed, "Shit, shit, shit, shit!"  
Before he could get halfway Mikasa and Annie dispatched the titans for them.  
"Oh my god you saved my life, Oh my god thank you so much!" Sasha cooed over Annie.  
"Do a better job next time" came the cold reply,  
"So harsh."  
Connie rubbing his head walked over to Mikasa "Sorry Mikasa that was pretty bad huh."  
"Not at all" said Mikasa, "consider it repayment for earlier."  
"Haha okay you're still the best Mikasa."  
"Thank-you" she replied walking away.  
Jean couldn't help but think "Damn she is always so cold with everyone except Eren, what's that bastard have that we don't?"  
Jean shook his head correcting himself "Can't be speaking ill of the dead like that."  
"Hey Jean you having a fit or something man?" Connie teased.  
"Shut your face."  
"Ooohh maybe I should call Mikasa back you're always so nice when she's around."  
Jean felt his ears redden "Why you little…"  
"Cool your vents princess, we did it. We can re-gas now."  
Jean smiled at his embarrassment "Yeah let's get it done."  
Leaving Connie with his gear Jean sat next to Marco, good old level headed Marco.  
"So nice leadership skills" Oh fucking shit.  
Marco laughed at the expression on Jean's face "Hey easy there."  
"I'm not a leader" Jean said downcast, "seriously what kind of leader leaves people to die."  
"The ones who know what the score it"  
Jean looked at Marco in incredulity "What?"  
"Look Jean you're a good leader, hell a damn good one and it's not cause you're strong either."  
"Hey you're really lowing the bar for the cheering up game."  
"Well you need to hear this then. It's because you know what it's like to be weak, you can relate to everyone and they know it too."  
"Just think about it" said Marco as he finished gassing and got up.  
Suddenly the building began to rumble and dust floated down from the roof.  
"So boss what's the plan"  
"I really hate you Marco."

"The big ones are making their way through the outer building now" said Mikasa "we can't tarry."  
"Agreed" said Reiner and Jean in unison.  
The whole team was re-gassed and ready to go just as the inner doors crashed open and six more four meter class titans poured through. Thankfully the team was all ready and they all were up the elevator before the titans were even close.  
Making their way across the courtyard the crashing of titan's through the building was getting louder.  
"Everyone one the rooftops" shouted Jean "Reiner and Connie spread to the sides and get us numbers."  
Off they went, Jean turned to Sasha "Take Annie and make sure everyone gets up, Mikasa, Bertolt and I will go to the top and scout ahead."  
Jean along with his squad deviated and manoeuvred to the platform at the top of the building taking a moment to catch his breath Jean looked over the side and his heart stopped.  
Dead titans so many of them he lost count at around 15 and at least half of them were smoking so they had been dead for at least a few minutes while other were still gently steaming, the other titans simply climbing over the corpses to get inside..  
What's going on" Mikasa said "do we have allies in the area?"  
"I thought everyone has been wiped out?" said Bertolt, "not to mention I can't see anyone, maybe their dead."  
"They were wiped out, that's why so many of us died" Jean said, "It's also not feasible they would send any reinforcements, it's a death trap."  
"Hey guys everyone's in position" said Armin as he flew up to the platform."  
"Hey Armin check it out, any ideas?" asked Jean.  
"Whoa" he remarked and after surveying for a moment he said "It's been one guy who did this."  
Everyone gasped and took a step back from the edge "You serious Armin?"  
"Yeah check it out, they all only have one slash not two." He said pointing at the bodies necks.  
"No gouge just deep enough to sever the necks weak spot."  
"He must have picked them off while they were trying to get into the building" surmised Bertolt.  
"I agree" said Armin, then he pointed "but look over there."  
Every looked where he was pointing and they went pale, a line of dead titan's heading down the main street.  
"Hey Mikasa" said Jean shakily "we didn't come from that way did we?"  
"No."  
"Yeah thought so just checking."

Suddenly Armin choked and had tears in his eyes, tears of horror.  
"Oh god" he fell to his knees staring at an abnormal titan a few streets over.  
"Armin what's wrong?" Mikasa said quickly going to his side.  
"T-t-t-that's t-the t-t-titan that k-killed T-Thomas" he screamed.  
Jean eyes went red, he saws Mikasa's eyes go dark "The one who wounded Eren right Armin?"  
"The one who got him killed"  
Armin could only nod his head limply.  
Jean and Mikasa drew their blades at the same time, staring at the titan.  
"It took Eren by surprise, don't rush this" Jean spoke to Mikasa  
Mikasa said nothing but her eyes said she would rip it to shreds, they burned with an almost unholy lust for death, Jean couldn't help but feel a tinge of fear seeing those eyes.  
They ran to the edge ready to jump off but stopped shocked by the scene before them. The abnormal had turned and then fallen over steaming. Culled by a lone ODM user the abnormal crashed through a building and was still.  
Too far away to even see who it was Mikasa stood enraged having been robbed of her prey, Jean was shocked by the appearance of an ally and the rest were too busy watching that they never noticed the fifteen meter who had made it through the building and climbed up spookily silent until it had gotten right behind them.  
"Behind us!" Bertolt shouted.  
Everyone turned ready to fight but they knew when its hand was already approaching they hadn't the time. The others were at the opposite end of the complex, they hadn't seen it until it was too late and they were between a titan and a long way down, at the bottom more titans.  
Mikasa saw the world moving slowly, she brandished her blades, shouted a cry and flew at the titan and breakneck speed, ready to kill.  
A shadow flittered overhead and a yell of rage broke Mikasa concentration, but what she saw made her drop her blades, her hands couldn't move, her chest was heaving, she felt electrified with only one word in her mind she whispered, "Eren."  
He flew like a demon out of hell, crashing into the titan's eye and slashing it out the slide. Manoeuvring downwards between the titan's legs, Eren hit the ground rolling while still connected the titan's knee.  
Roaring the titan turned but Eren had already reeled in and using his blade like a climbing pole gouged it into the titan, heaving himself up and gouging it in again and again until he reached the neck. With a scream he plunged it in and yanked until the titans legs gave out, with the force he leapt on the platform and collapsed in a heap.

 _Author's Note: I deeply enjoyed exploring Jean's personality a little here. He is a reluctant leader but still takes up the mantle when it is required of him. Being one of the more deep characters I'm wondering where I can take him but still he need's to find a girl and settle down. Seriously he can crush on Mikasa all he wants but he isn't blind she is literally devoted to Eren in every way, shape and form. Thanks again for reading. Ciao._

 _C.C._


	4. Escape

As the titan toppled free Eren was thrown to the ground, hard.

"Eren!" screamed Mikasa, already flying towards the limp form lying prostate in the courtyard.

"Shit" Jean exclaimed, watching four titans enter the area "Bertolt grab Reiner and Annie, get a defensive net around them"

"On it!" Bertolt said, already on the way.

Jean maneuvered his way down to Mikasa, Annie and Reiner already joining Bertolt in taking the titans attention. "How did that crazy bastard get out of Armin's story huh?"

Jean landing with a slide by Mikasa eager to see the idiot and soon wished he hadn't. His heart stopped and all he felt was horror. That thing that used to be Eren couldn't be alive, shouldn't be if the laws of nature had their way. His skin once a light tan was now red with blood and burns, his eyes staring off into the distance, barely breathing but still clutching a lone, dull blade. Jean's eyes welled at Mikasa's sobs, maybe in her state she hadn't even noticed how he looked, but even then with a suspension of disbelief you couldn't overlook the fact that he wasn't all there. Both his left arm and leg we gone, at the knee and elbow respectively, leaving ragged torn stumps cauterized by some heat.

Eren's clothes were torn and soaked with blood both steaming and caked on, a brutal testament to the war that put him here.

"Mikasa we need to get moving" said Jean, angst creeping into his voice, two of the four titans down but more rolling in.

"No I won't leave him!"

"Mikasa..."

"NO!"

As soon as the word left her mouth Jean made a snap decision reversing his blade and thumping it on the back of head, knocking her to the ground. Not fully unconscious but enough for his purposes.

"CONNIE!" he bellowed, not only drawing the attention of the young man helping the last of the recruits leave the area but also three titans the just made there way over the edge.

"Shit" Jean knew he wouldn't be able to carry a person and fight them off, Connie arrived just in time stumbling a little at the sight of so many titans bearing down.

"Grab Mikasa and get out of here, tell the others to break off the assault and get moving too."

'But Jean..."

"No buts buddy I'm coming just... gotta get a friend out of here too."

Connie nodded gently levering Mikasa onto his shoulder and hopping away quickly. Jean stared at the young man, lying in the dirt, wondering how many lives including his own would be sacrificed just to give a funeral.

Muttering yet again the moniker Suicidal Bastard, he rushed to bend down and gently ease him up onto his shoulder but the titans had gotten close.

'Shit" Jean knew there wasn't much he could do with Eren on him like this, as he knelt preparing for a do or die dash to the finish.

As the titan's reached for him Jean activated his gear and flung violently to one side, scraping his leg against the ground, bloody but determined his maneuvered his way to the rafters and followed the retreating figures, the fear that titans would be on their trail and the bigger fear, when Mikasa came to.

 _Authors Note: It has been a long time indeed and I almost feel sorry with such a small chapter to start things again. Only just over 500 words this time around but I needed something to get me between story areas. Think of this as a little filler for you. I hope you're ready for an influx of content._

 _C.C._


	5. Recovery

Eren awoke in cold sweat, moonlight breaking gently through the curtains on his window, cool night air washing away the nightmarish images from his mind.

Thinking back to the moment Thomas was killed, he felt so foolish. Charging in gung-ho, he knew the others would follow, he was their leader. Now their dead, all of them dead and he may as well be.

 _Two weeks prior_

Eren thrashed in his bed, ripping stitches through his skin, screaming as the images assaulted his mind, everyone dying, the titans smiling, his leg and arm being bitten off. No doctors, nurses or friends could calm him, just the sound of Mikasa's voice flowing over him to sooth him. His tears soaking the bandages that covered his face.

 _Present_

Eren remembered that fear, of waking into the unknown, nothing to tether him to sanity as the pain washed over him. Looking over to the cot in the corner he saw Mikasa's slumbering body rise up and down. She had barely left the room in nearly two months. Two whole months thought Eren…

 _One week prior_

"Eren Yaeger" the pompous Captain Wellman screeched, "for conduct unbecoming a leader and 5th ranking graduate you are hereby…"  
"Awarded a medal" the cheerfully blithe General Pixis butted in.  
"Sir this boy…"  
"Survived a titan assault with no prior experience and giving new definition to the term 'single handed' removed many titans from our walls."  
"But sir!"  
"That will be all Captain, I only needed you to show me where this place was anyway."  
Harrumphing and turning sharply the Captain left the room in a huff, leaving Eren, Mikasa and General Pixis.

 _Present_

During that enlightening conversation Eren found out he had been unconscious for over a month, before waking up a couple of weeks ago and was being presented with a medal for valorous conduct in the face of severe adversity.  
A short while later Jean dropped by, slightly worldlier and a lot less up himself, Jean and Eren had quite a good talk until Jean told him about Marco. Mikasa eye's dropped and Eren gasped in horror, Marco a top graduate like themselves had been devoured, it just didn't seem possible that so many of them made it but Marco had always been such a good man. So much had happened…

 _3 days ago_

"Eren!" Armin shouted  
"Armin is that you?" Eren responded in kind cracking a smile for the first time in days.  
"Sure is!" Armin smiled, turning his head "hey Mikasa."  
"Hey" was the only reply as she got up and moved to a chair by the window.  
Armin looked after her with a sad look in his eyes giving Eren pause, wondering what had happened while he was out. His usual obliviousness seemed to have left him, everything seemed so very open to his eyes now.  
"So even a General came to visit but had to wrangle you out here huh" Eren teased.  
"Haha you're not far off, the General and I came up with the idea to take back Trost with the help of the scout recon team and I've been helping put everything back together since we plugged the hole."  
"Wow aren't you all important now."  
"Knock it off Eren or I'll call Annie in for some practice sessions!"  
"Okay I give, I give!" laughing with his best friend like nothing had changed.  
After some more good natured jabs Armin revealed some bread and meat he had nabbed from commands luncheon, Mikasa came over and after some of the usual fuss allowed her to feed him.  
After some time the walls between her and Armin came down and everyone laughed so hard when food shot out of Mikasa nose while sneezing. There was no dignifying way to come back from such an action so the response was walloping both the troublesome boys with pillows until they yielded their memories.  
"It's been good Eren" chuckled Armin, face still pink from the days laughing, "I'll try not to be so much a stranger."  
"You better not." Eren threatened.  
"Armin" Mikasa mumbled.  
"Mhmm?"  
"Have a good night."  
"You too!" he shouted while bouncing out the door.  
Shifting at the numb feeling in his leg, Eren decided to broach the subject.  
"So what happened between you two while I was gone?"  
Mikasa flinched and rushed over falling to her knees and grabbing his head "You weren't gone you hear me!"  
"You will never be gone, I won't allow it, I'll never leave your side, I won't!"  
"Mikasa…"  
"I…I…I thought you were dead" she sobbed falling onto the bed, "'I blamed Armin I…I… hit him, I yelled at him."  
"Then even after you were back you were so still, you never moved, I couldn't do anything. If I had just stayed with you."  
Eren could only hold her while she sobbed, unable to think of anything to say that would comfort her.

 _Present_

The sheet as blocking the air from hitting his skin, Eren threw the covers to his side hoping to cool off, realising only after it wasn't the sheet getting him hot. Thick, white bandages, covered from his neck to the waist, extending over the stub of what used to be an arm and further down what used to be a leg. Eren remembered his thoughts from when he escaped the titan, a cripple can't fight titans, he wouldn't be able to live up to his promise, avenge his mother, find his father's secret or join the recon squad. Worst of all he couldn't be by…

"Eren?" said a familiar feminine voice.  
Always astounded by how quietly she could move, Mikasa was knelt by his bedside, already wiping away the hot tears he wished could have been hidden. Her eyes bore into his, making his heart race, the hair he told her to cut just above her shoulders, waving gently in the nights breeze, hands calloused yet soft holding his face.  
"Mikasa…" Eren began tears already welling in his eyes, "how can I go on, how can I?  
Mikasa's gaze never left him or faltered, staring deeply, almost unnervingly intimate.  
"Eren" she began "do you remember what you told me? All those years ago?"  
"Wha…"  
"Think hard, back to when you saved me."  
Eren mind flashed back to those few moments he had decided to take a life to save that a beautiful young girl, so scared and alone.  
"I told you…"  
"You told me to fight Eren" she whispered, standing up, but never breaking her hold on him.  
"If nothing else you told me to always fight, to never surrender and that was living."  
In a move that set his face aflame she gently placed a kiss on his forehead, her lips burning a mark in his skin, then drew him into her embrace.  
"You will fight and if you fall I'll be there to pick you up again" she continued to whisper as Eren wept into her gown "no matter how many times you fall, no matter how long, I will always be your sword, your shield, your back, your armour and… your heart Eren."  
Eren's good arm had supported him but now fell, as they did back into the bed, as he wrapped the arm around her. Mikasa stroked his hair as he cried himself to sleep in her arms. Mikasa hoping that the dark had erased the blush which accommodated her cheeks whenever she touched him.  
Eren listening to the sound of Mikasa's heart and the smoothing strokes of her hand, for tonight at least, no longer feared tomorrow.

 _Authors Note: Okay back in the groove! Not as much action as I'm sure many were hoping for but I always prefer a little bit of story in between huge sections. As probably realised I intend to flesh out an entirely new story into the narrative of the old one. A lot more character development and a whole lot of romance. Which seriously people who write manga, I don't care if your story is action oriented, you need character depth to dammit even if it is superficial. Peace. (I know this is forward but a review either telling me I could improve or just saying this is freaking awesome will go a long way.)  
_

C.C.


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